Chapter 53
I sent an email to everyone at KJM while I thought about how to break the news to them what I had decided. The whole night, I tossed and turned This was the only way. It seemed like the right way, without any collateral damage.
“I’m done,” I said, getting up from his seat and packing my laptop into the bag. Killian stared at me the whole time I was writing the email, sitting across the table. We were in his office at the headquarters–the room we slept in was attached to this office. That’s why there were no windows. We were stif underground. The moment I figured that out, it somehow started to feel more suffocating-
Killian didn’t stop looking at me with that critical expression.
“If you want to say something, say something. Don’t stare at me like this,” I said.
“This is a bad idea. Don’t do it.”
“I’ve decided. I’m not continuing this. And you said you’d respect my decision.”
“Tommen Anderson and the Mengs–they’re after you. And now we have Christen Meng. More than ever, they’ll come,” he reasoned.
“I’m not saying we won’t fight if Meng comes after us. And deal with Anderson as you see fit, just don’t…”
“Kill them? But the only reason they’re alive is because you wanted them alive. They’re no use to me. It’s annoying how many men are guarding the Anderson Mansion at this moment. If I started to do what I see fit…” He tilted his head to the side to look at me. “Then forgive me, darling, this will end with you burying them.”
“Stop it,” I said, looking away. I wouldn’t care about burying them. He walked around the table and leaned into my space while I tried to hold his powerful gaze. Merciless. That was the only word I could find to describe his look.
“You can uphold your standards, but those don’t apply to me. The only thing stopping me is your word. If you leave this to me…”
There was no need to say more. I wouldn’t even find this in the newspaper this time.
“I want KJM out of this. We truly don’t know what my father is capable of. And the Mengs… they’re already something I don’t want them involved with.”
“Misha is quite involved.”
“He has his own agenda. I don’t interfere with it.”
“But he dragged your name into this. Otherwise, the Mengs wouldn’t even know about M’s existence.”
“He’s a good asset. But his work is done too. I need to separate this from KJM.”
Killian leaned back against the table.
“Once I’ve my mother’s funeral, I’ll let go of it all.”
“Can you tell me why the sudden change of heart? You wanted to kill them yesterday.”
“This is it, right? I still want to. But I want to be better than that,” I said. If someone I care about gets hurt again… so help me, God, I’ll kill whoever that person is. I walked away from him and opened the door to the room attached to his office.
The ancestral grounds of the Knights were another piece of land, just half a mile away from their ancestral home. It was well maintained and beautiful. All of us gathered around the freshly dug pit, and my mother’s coffin beside it.
I watched as they lowered the coffin. I saw her face one last time as they closed it. She somehow looked better now. I could even dare say–pretty, dressed in black and peaceful. I had no words for farewell. I had truly failed as a daughter. The only thing I could think in that moment was: She suffered
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Chapter 53
because of me. Because they wanted to use her against me.
“I’m sorry,” I said as the coffin disappeared under the dirt. Now, she was truly gone. Killian’s arms came around me, and I leaned into Mint
Now one can see how easy death is. But it was me who was left somewhat empty. Or maybe it was that part of met thought would be filled today never got to feel it.
Killian’s hands fell from my side and I turned. He squeezed my hand, and I squeezed his back. He silently left, giving me time to talk to others watched his back as he walked away, disappearing into the small outhouse on the grounds before the gates opened to the cemetery. The green grass stretched beneath us. It was serene and peaceful in a way.
I turned back to see the faces of the people around me. Jina was the first to come and hug me
“I’m so sorry,” she said. I stood there, lightly tapping her back, then letting my hand fall.
“This is over now,” I said. I didn’t know if I was comforting her or myself. It should be better than doing anything else. It should be. Yet that sprouting fire! was trying to suppress… it started to emerge. I pushed it deep down as Jina let go.
Kevin came next. He gave a brief, awkward hug and let go more quickly than I did. I ruffled his hair.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Trying to be,” I said honestly. I looked at each face. Everyone from KJM was there. And somehow, I was glad. I did have something to show for. This would’ve been pathetic without them. They all held wary expressions. I took a deep breath.
“It’s fine. It’s fine, okay? Let’s move, alright?” I looked at everyone and swallowed the lump in my throat.
When everyone started to talk among themselves, I pulled Jina to my side and rehearsed the words I wanted to say, over and over again in my head. We
stood under a tree.
“What is it?” Jina asked, standing beside me, her eyes narrowing as she searched my face.
I licked my lips, trying to find the right words.
“I’ve never seen you like this–nervous,” she noted, her tone soft but edged with suspicion.
“I’m quitting,” I said.
She blinked. “You’re quitting?” Her brows furrowed. “Quitting smoking? Because that would actually be great news-
“No,” I cut in, my voice low. I clenched and unclenched my fist. “I mean KJM.”
Her expression froze.
“You’re joking?” she asked flatly, staring at me like she didn’t recognize me. “You have to be.”
“I’m not,” I said. “I want you to wind up KJM as it is–shut it down. If you still want to continue, fine. Start something new. But on paper, in the public eye, everyone needs to know the ‘M‘ in it doesn’t stand for me anymore.”
She scoffed and turned as if to walk away.
“No–please. Listen,” I said quickly, stepping toward her.
She stopped and spun back around, her jaw clenched. “How can you even say this? After everything we’ve been through!” Her voice cracked with disbelief. She looked like she was restraining the urge to punch me in the face.
“You have plans–dreams. You want to expand this. I want that for you too. But from now on, keep it strictly legal. Train new people. It’s a vulnerable
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phase… and if I’m around-
“What?” she snapped. “It’s going to be dangerous? You think I don’t already know that? You think everyone standing behind me doesn’t know tha
“Jina, why won’t you understand-
“No, you don’t understand!” she cut me off. “We’ve come so far, and now, after one defeat, you’re just running away like a coward!”
I stepped back, her words sinking like stones in my chest. I lowered my
voice.
“It was Tommen,” I said. “He told Francesca to poison me.”
The rage in her face faltered.
“What?”
“He was a Shadow Knight,” I continued, each word heavy on my tongue. “And Adeline… she’s allied with the Chinese Mafia.” I swallowed hard, “It was Tommen behind it all.”
Jina’s brow creased, confusion and disbelief twisting her features.
“I always thought your father was just… a silent bystander,” she murmured.
“Didn’t we all?” I replied bitterly. “I never got the chance to tell you before, but… half the Shadow Knight Organization? It used to belong to the Andersons. My grandfather left it for me. Tommen wants it. And now he’s with the Mengs. They may not match the Knights in influence, but they’re brutal –and once they sink their claws in, they don’t let go.”
I slipped my hands into my coat pocket. I try not to think of the empty feeling that is trying to come over me.
“If you don’t believe me, ask Misha. He knows. You’ve done more for me than I ever deserved, and I’ll never forget that. But this… this is the only way.”
Thunder growled overhead as dark clouds rolled in. The air between us shifted–thick with tension.
Jina gritted her teeth. “You’re running away,” she said. “This is exactly when you stay close to the people you
trust.”
“Sooner or later, they’ll find out about me. About the others. The people standing behind you–they’re not ready for what’s coming. We promised them anonymity: Freedom. If I stay, that promise breaks. I’m not telling you to stop what we started. I’m telling you to change its name. Assume a new identity. You’ve already wasted enough time on me. There’s no reason to do it anymore.”
Her voice dropped, bitter and cutting. “So now we’re the weaker side. You built this empire, and now you’re leaving because it’s not going your way? Who’s going to protect you? That Knight? Is that where you’re going now–running to be the Knight’s Queen?”
Her words sliced deeper than I expected. Maybe because they sounded exactly like what I feared my decision would seem like.
“I’m not taking over the Knights,” I said. “And I’m not–” I stopped. I didn’t even know where I was going.
I had no answers left.
“I don’t want to hear any more,” she said, her voice like steel. “Go. Do whatever it is you’ve planned.”
The wind picked up, rustling her hair as she turned from me and walked toward the others. I stood frozen as she rejoined them. They all turned to look at me–confused, frowning, guarded.
And just like that, the invisible wall between two part of my life come up
