Chapter 180
Aria
4x
First Person POV
His hand was still on my throat.
Not squeezing. Just holding.
Firm. Steady. Too calm.
I could feel the heat from his skin. I could feel my pulse thudding under his thumb. I could barely think straight. My breath was stuck somewhere in my chest and my whole body was locked up.
He looked at me like he was daring me to argue.
But I didn’t. I couldn’t.
I didn’t even try to push him away.
My hands were gripping the sides of his shirt. I didn’t even remember grabbing it. I just needed something to hold. Something to stop the spinning inside my head.
His grip loosened just slightly.
I thought maybe he would step back. Maybe he would give me space.
But I moved first.
I stood on my toes and kissed him.
I don’t know why I did it. I didn’t think about it. I didn’t weigh it out. I just did it. Because I was angry. Because I was tired. Because I hated that he was right. Because I needed something to hold onto.
His mouth met mine fast.
Hungry.
It wasn’t soft.
It wasn’t slow.
He kissed me like he had been waiting for this. Like he was tired of pretending to be gentle.
His hands grabbed my waist and pulled me closer. My back hit the balcony wall and I didn’t care. I kissed him harder. I wanted him closer. I wanted more.
His hands were everywhere.
On my sides.
My hips.
Up my back.
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Chapter 180
Under the robe I was still wearing.
His fingers found bare skin and I gasped.
But I didn’t stop him.
He grabbed my thigh and pulled it around his waist. I held onto his shoulders tighter. My breath was loud in my ears. My whole body was hot. I felt like I was on fire.
I could feel how badly he wanted me.
It made my head spin.
I let him push against me. I let him kiss me like he was losing control. I kissed him back like I already had.
His hand moved up my thigh and gripped hard.
My body arched.
He groaned into my mouth and it made my knees go weak.
His other hand slid under my robe again and found my lower back.
I pressed myself into him. I needed to feel every inch of him.
We kept kissing. Harder. Deeper. Like we were trying to swallow each other whole.
He bit my bottom lip and I moaned.
His mouth moved to my neck.
He kissed my jaw.
My throat.
Right where his hand had been before.
I tilted my head and let him.
My hands were under his shirt now. I scratched at his back. I didn’t care if I left marks. I wanted to. I wanted him to remember this. I wanted to leave something behind.
He kissed me again, slower this time, and his hands moved with more purpose, like he was trying to memorize every inch of me. One hand slid up the back of my thigh, fingers spreading as he gripped gently, like he couldn’t help himself, while the other traveled under the silk robe and found the curve of my waist, resting there like it belonged. His touch wasn’t rough, but it wasn’t timid either. It made my skin feel hot, flushed, alive: I pressed myself against him, gasping into his mouth when his fingers moved, brushing along the side of my ribcage, trailing up to just beneath my breast, stopping like he was daring me to say no–but I didn’t. I didn’t want him to stop. I wanted more. His mouth left mine and trailed down the side of my neck, kissing and dragging his lips along my skin until I was arching into him without meaning to. I could feel every breath he took against my collarbone, every shift in the way his body leaned into mine. My hand gripped the back of his neck, my other sliding under his shirt, fingers skating over his stomach and up his spine. He was so warm. Solid. Every movement felt like fire spreading across my nerves. When he kissed me again, it was deeper. He pulled me tighter. Our mouths moved in sync, like we were trying to disappear into each other. His teeth grazed my bottom lip and my whole body shivered. I whimpered into him, and I didn’t care how desperate I sounded. I was desperate. For him. For this. For something that made the noise in my head go quiet. He backed me up until my shoulder blades hit the balcony wall again, but this time he kept kissing me while his hands kept moving–squeezing, exploring, learning. And I let him. I melted into him. Every inch of me felt open, raw, aching. I couldn’t think straight. Couldn’t breathe right. I didn’t want to. I wanted to drown in this. In him. In the way his hands gripped me like he’d never get enough. In the way his mouth devoured mine like he’d been starving for it. The tension between us was heavy, thick, hot. My robe was slipping off one shoulder and I barely noticed. His breath was shaky now, like he was losing control too. Like I wasn’t the only one falling apart.
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Chapter 180
I wanted him to want me like this again.
He kissed back up to my mouth and pressed his forehead to mine.
We were both breathing hard.
We were both still holding on like we didn’t want to stop.
But we did stop.
Eventually.
Because the world was still turning.
Because the sky was getting brighter.
Because someone would come looking for us soon.
He didn’t say anything.
He just looked at me.
I looked right back.
My chest was heaving.
My lips were swollen.
My hands were still gripping his shirt.
He brushed my hair out of my face and leaned in close again.
Not to kiss me.
Just to breathe me in.
“You drive me insane,” he said.
I nodded slowly. “You just threw my phone off a balcony.”
He grinned.
“Still think I don’t own you?” he asked, his voice rough.
I didn’t answer.
I couldn’t.
Because maybe he did.
And maybe I liked it.
