Chapter 158
I was dressed up, my hair made perfectly, and my bag was resting beside me on the bed. But I sat still, staring at my reflection in the mirror, at the ghost of myself gazing back. My eyes were hollow, soulless pits of exhaustion and quiet surrender.
1 had passed out last night in the middle of the fight with Alessandro. When I woke up, I was in his bed, wrapped in unfamiliar sheets that smelled like him, like power and violence and something I no longer recognized as safety.
I didn’t want to think about what had happened. I refused to let my mind go there. If I did, I would shatter again.
So I didn’t. I sealed it away like all the other horrors he had carved into my soul.
This was the end.
I had made up my mind.
It was over.
I was done.
The face of Alessandro, I saw last night, I never want to see it again. There was a monster behind those eyes, a monster he keeps under wraps in public. The monster that was glaring into my soul last night, the monster that sat over me, restrained me. I never wanted to see that monster again.
I shook my head and pulled out a notebook from my bag. I ripped a page out of the notebook and wrote a note.
After I was done, I placed my cell phone over it, leaving everything on my bed. I grabbed my bag and looked around the room.
Tears brimmed at the corner of my eyes and I immediately went to the mirror, wiping the corner of my eyes, I smiled at myself. I needed to sell it, I needed to make everyone here believe that I was completely fine..
I can’t be stupid, not right now…
Alessandro was probably not around but his men were in the house.
All these men around me were professional murderers, cheaters, rapists, killers, and torturers, they weren’t normal men. They were animals and to trick an animal you have to become an animal. You have to be an evil, immoral person to play the same game as these men.
I laughed quite fakely in the mirror, channeling the bubbly, happy, and ignorant Nikolai. All along I thought that Alessandro was in love with me, I gave myself to him but it was all nonsense. He was just obsessed with me.
I looked around the room one last time before I went downstairs. I went to the dining room, I greeted the maids all around me.
I told them what I’d like to have for breakfast, as usual, everything is fine, everything is normal. They served me breakfast and I ate it silently, happily…
I finished up my breakfast and slung my bag over my shoulder. I strolled outside and the first person I saw was Antonio, Alessandro’s driver; leaning against the wall and smoking a cigarette.
I hated him too now. He probably drove Alessandro to my parent’s house.
“Good morning Nikolai“, He spoke.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Yes ask..”
1/2
Chapter 158
I swallowed and plastered a big smile on my face as I walked to the car.
Antonio opened the back door of the car for me, giving a slight nod like always, Predictable, Routine. That was the key, acting like today was just another day.
I stepped inside without a word and settled into the seat, my bag gripped tightly beside me, not across me. I didn’t relax. My spine stayed straight, shoulders squared, like I was preparing for war.
Antonio slid into the driver’s seat, glanced at me through the rearview mirror, then asked in that always–too–familiar voice, “Where to today, Nikolai?
I didn’t miss a beat.
‘Studio,” I said casually. “I’ve got a shoot scheduled.”
A pause.
“Alessandro didn’t say anything about you leaving the house.”
I leaned forward slightly, resting one arm on the back of the seat in front of me, my tone playful but with an edge. ‘Did he also forget to tell you I’m not his prisoner?” I wanted to slap him across his face, snatch his gun and shoot him with his own gun but that would be stupid of me, ‘I didn’t want to be stupid again. I smiled and turned my head away.
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