190 The Heart’s Quiet Surrender
“I know that.” A tear slipped down my check. “But I swore I wouldn’t be that weak again. I wouldn’t let another man have that kind of power over me.”
Vera moved to her kitchen, pulling ingredients from cabinets. “I’m making us cocktails. This conversation requires something stronger than wine.”
“To going with the flow,” Vera raised her glass again.
“Love should be a little scary” Vera leaned back into the cushions. “If it doesn’t scare you at least a little, it’s probably not worth having.”
Vera rolled her eyes. “And you think they care about gossip?”
“I do.” She smiled. “Which is exactly why it might be good for you.”
“Don’t you, though?” Vera challenged. “You’ve seen him at his most vulnerable. You’ve seen how he treats others when there’s nothing to gain. And more importantly, he knows you–the real you.”
“You’re not a burden. You’re a successful businesswoman who’s been through hell.” Vera’s voice softened. “And Sebastian clearly doesn’t care about any of that mess.”
“There’s more, isn’t there?” Vera knew me too well.
“Because it terrifies me.” My voice was small. “The way I feel about him after such a short time–it’s overwhelming. And if he hurt me…”
“And the other part?”
I took a deep gulp of my cocktail, feeling a strange sense of liberation wash over me. with the flow. For once in my life, I’m not going to “I’m going to go with the flow. For once in my life, I’m not going to struggle against my
feelings.”
Vera stood and came to me, taking my hands in hers. “That’s not weakness. That’s your heart recognizing something real.”
“So?”
“So what now?” she finally asked.
190 The Heart’s Quiet Surrender
“So instead you’ll walk away from what might be the love of your life?” Vera pulled back to look at me. “That’s not protecting yourself, Hazel. That’s punishing yourself
I shook my head. “That’s not the point. I don’t want to be someone’s burden.”
“Sebastian isn’t Alistair,” Vera sald firmly.
Vera crossed her arms. “Explain yourself. Now”
“Maybe I can just… stop fighting it so hard. The idea formed as I spoke it. “Stop running from him. Stop overthinking every interaction.”
“I don’t know what to do,” I confessed. “Every time I’m around Sebastian, I feel like I’m losing control. Like I’m falling and there’s no safety net.”
“Not ridiculous.” She shook the cocktail mixer with vigor. “Just human. After what you’ve been through, your caution makes sense.”
I nodded. “He said he respects my decision. That he’ll be there as a friend if I need
him.”
I sank onto the arm of the sofa. “What if this is just a rebound? What if I’m so desperate not to be the pathetic ex–wife that I’m latching onto the first man who’s shown me kindness
“Oh, Hazel.” Vera set her glass down with a thud. “Why would you do that? He’s perfect for you.”
other person
Maybe that was enough for now. A heart’s quiet surrender, not to but to its own capacity to feel–to hope–once more.
I nodded, unable to meet her eyes. “I told Sebastian and his mother that I have no intention of getting into a new relationship. That I’m focusing on my career instead.”
-I buried my face against her shoulder. “I know. And that’s exactly why I can’t do it. I
can’t put myself through that again.”
I accepted the drink, considering her words. “I never thought of it that way.”
“That sounds like a plan I can get behind.” Vera grinned.
“Then why are you fighting it so hard?”
## Hazel’s POV
190 The Heart’s Quiet Surrender
“Love isn’t weakness, Hazel.”
“I turned him down,” I finally admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.
I took a deep breath. “Look at the mess I’ve been dragged through these past months.
father’s arres
The divorce, the scandal with Ivy, my My name has been splashed across every tabloid.”
“So Sebastian’s family has a spotless reputation.” I stood up, suddenly restless. “The Sinclairs are practically American royalty. They advise presidents, for heaven’s sake.”
Vera nearly spat out her drink. “You did what?”
The truth was more complicated than I wanted to admit. I walked to the window, watching the city lights twinkle in the distance.
“That’s ridiculous.” Vera refilled her glass. “The Sinclairs have enough power to crush any gossip. One word from them, and no publication would dare print your name.”
go of “Maybe that’s exactly what you need.” Vera squeezed my shoulders gently. “To let control for once.”
I took a sip, the sweet–tart liquid warming my throat. “I told him I wanted to focus on my career.
I watched her work, grateful for the momentary distraction. “You think I’m being ridiculous, don’t you?”
Vera nodded encouragingly. “Go on.”
“What’s that?”
“And that’s… bad?” Vera’s confusion was evident.
The question hit me like a physical blow. Why was I? The answer came with startling clarity.
Vera pulled me into a tight hug. “Oh, honey. That’s the risk we all take. There are never any guarantees in love.”
I pressed my forehead against the cool glass. “I’m falling in love with him, Vera.”
“Is still terrified. I opened my eyes, reaching for the resolve that had carried me through the darkest days after Alistair’s betrayal. “But maybe… maybe I don’t have to
190 The Heart’s Quiet Surrender
make any grand decisions right now.”
As we clinked glasses, I felt something loosen in my chest–a knot of anxiety I’d been carrying for so long I’d forgotten it was there. I wasn’t making any promises, not even to myself. But for the first time since Alistair walked out of my life, I wasn’t actively closing the door on possibility.
“Is that what you honestly believe?” Vera asked.
“That you’re right.” I stared into my glass. “That I’m pushing away something real because I’m too afraid to be vulnerable again.”
“You think you wouldn’t survive it,” Vera finished for me.
I let out a watery laugh. “You know I’m terrible at that.”
Her words struck deep. Was that what I was doing? Punishing myself for being foolish enough to love Alistair all those years?
She returned with two vibrant blue drinks. “But Hazel, being able to love again after betrayal isn’t weakness. It’s the opposite. It takes tremendous strength to open your heart when you know exactly how badly it can hurt.”
I closed my eyes, feeling the tension slowly draining from my shoulders. “I don’t know. Part of me wants to call him right now and take everything back.”
“Of course not. You’ve been too busy beating yourself up.” Vera clinked her glass against mine. “To healing hearts and second chances.”
“That’s part of the problem.” I sighed. “He’s so perfect it makes me suspicious. Nobody’s that good, Vera. Nobody’s that patient.”
We sat in comfortable silence for a moment, the only sound the soft jazz playing from Vera’s speakers.
I nodded, fresh tears spilling. “I barely survived Alistair’s betrayal. If Sebastian did the
same…”
“And did he accept that?”
“Everyone cares about gossip when it could affect their standing.” I paced along her plush carpet. “I’d be bringing nothing but trouble to his doorstep.”
190 The Heart’s Quiet Surrender
“Of course he did.” Vera rolled her eyes. “The man is practically a saint.”
“Isn’t it?” My voice cracked. “Because
says my name in that time Sebastian looks at me with those eyes,~
every time he of his, I feel myself crumbling. All my defenses, all my carefully built walls–they mean nothing”
I pulled away, wiping at my eyes. “I feel so foolish. I barely know him.”
“Is he though?” I tucked a strand of hair behind my car. “Or is he just perfect on paper?”
I turned to face her, feeling the first sting of tears. “Six years I gave to Alistair. Six years of blood transfusions, of supporting his career, of planning our future. And look how that ended.”
I hesitated. “No. What I feel for Sebastian is… different. It’s not like anything I felt with Alistair. It’s… deeper somehow. More solid.”
I took another long sip of my drink, letting the alcohol warm my insides. “You know what scares me most?”
The soft glow of Vera’s living room lamps cast long shadows across the floor as I swirled the last of my wine. The weight of my confession hung in the air between us.
The words hung in the air, terrifying in their honesty.
“Or maybe he just loves you that much.” Vera raised an eyebrow. “Did you ever consider that?”
My throat tightened. “Maybe he should.”
“At least you’re self–aware,” Vera teased gently.
The thought made my heart flutter traitorously. “That’s even more terrifying.”
