Chapter 5
I woke up the next morning to a pounding headache. I couldn’t remember the last time I was hungover. In a strange way, it felt good. It was a reminder of my youth – a reminder that even without Jackson, I could have fun and be myself.
I
Almost as soon as I remembered breaking up with Jackson, though, the thought left my mind as I could no longer ignore the tugging sensation in the back of my neck. I rolled over, and my knee bumped into someone else’s body part. Cain! That’s right. We had a grand adventure last night, and now we were at the Cheshire Hotel. The tugging in the back of my neck melted away as my leg touched his. He stirred a little, mumbled something under his breath, and appeared to fall back asleep.
Suddenly, it all came back to me. The kiss in the stairway, the passionate sex in this hotel bed, the strong and burning desire for him to sink his teeth into my neck, completing a mating ritual as old as time.
He hadn’t.
Those words stung my soul, as I mouthed them out loud. He didn’t bite me.
I remembered sitting at the bar beside Cain, growing more and more confident of our mate bond as the night wore on. Initially, I had been surprised by the feeling and unsure of what it represented. But as the night wore on, it became unmistakable. Cain was my one, true mate. I felt drawn to him, mentally and physically, in a way I had never felt drawn to Jackson. Why, then, did he not seem to feel the same draw towards me? Sure, he was charming. He certainly seemed into me and turned on by my presence, but if he had also felt the draw of the mate bond, he would have bitten me, right?
The sunlight streaming in the window stung my eyes. I glanced at the clock and noted that it was only 7:30. I didn’t need to work today, thankfully. I hoped Cain didn’t have anywhere to be this early. If he did, he had not mentioned it last night.
As I laid in bed, willing myself to ignore my pounding headache I tried to reflect on all my mother told me when we’d had “the talk” when I was a teen. At the time, I had brushed off a lot of her advice. It felt awkward to talk about love and sex with my mom, especially when it came to werewolf sexuality. For so much of my youth, I was encouraged to control and hide my wolf side, so when my mom started speaking about mate bonding, I brushed off the information as being irrelevant, unimportant, and something I would not have to worry about for years to come. Now, I was starting to wish I had listened more closely.
I looked over at the door to the bathroom. Briefly, I considered sneaking over there, calling my mom, and asking her for advice. But that would mean telling my mom that Jackson and I broke up, which would be a whole… thing. Mom was never that fond of Jackson, and I knew her reaction would be along the lines of “I told you so.” Then, I’d have to tell her I met and hooked up with a random stranger at the bar. Mate bond or not, that was not the kind of thing I wanted to open up to my
mother about.
I looked over at Cain, whose head was resting awkwardly half on and half off the pillow. Even in his dream state with his mouth hanging open, he was unbelievably attractive. My heart hattered a little just looking at him. Perhaps he just needed more time. Maybe more traditional pack wolves had a somewhat different mating ritual than the one my mom was familiar with Or, did the fact that we were both drunk keep Cain from being me? Maybe he was concerned about consent and decided to wait until we were both sober. That would certainly be noble of him.
I sighed and closed my eyes, telling myself to go back to sleep. There had to be some good explanation as to why Cain hadn’t bitten me last night. It would reveal itself in time, so there was no use worrying about it any longer. I could feel the warmth of Cain’s body beside me, and it made me feel comfortable and cozy. Finally, a familiar sleepiness came over my mind and body, and I was able to drift off again.
When I woke up again, some hours later, I instinctively rolled over, trying to snuggle closer to Cain. But instead of landing on a broad, burly chest, my arm flopped down on the empty bed I sat up with a start. Beside me, the bed sheets and blankets had been tossed to the side Cain must have gotten up to use the bathroom.
1 glanced over to the bathroom door, and it was still open. How Gold of him! I laid back down, resting my head on the pillow, waiting for him to emerge
“Cain?” 1 finally called after a few minutes. There was no respon
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Chapter 5
“Cain, are you okay?” I called again. Once again, there was only silence.
Where could he have gone? My mind instantly jumped to the worst–case scenario. Had be woken up in the morning, seen who he fell asleep next to, and decided to flee before I awoke? I moved to sit on the edge of the bed, and immediately my head started pounding.
I sprung out of bed and headed to the bathroom. Sure enough, nobody was in there. Then, I noticed something even more alarming. Cain’s overnight bag, the one he had so awkwardly swung around as we walked here last night, was gone, too.
So, he really had left me. If he’d just stepped out for coffee, he would have left his bag, right? I flung back the covers on the bed, checking whether he may have left a note. I flung open the nightstand drawer, checking for the same. There was no sign of the note. Stranger yet, with Cain now out of my vicinity, that tugging in my neck was gone. Oddly, though, I still felt that familiar sensation between my legs. Last night, I had wondered whether I was coming into heat. Now, my heat was here in full force. So, in addition to being panicked by Cain’s sudden absence, I was also craving male attention attention in a very visceral, physical way.
–
any male
I slumped down on the floor, taking my head in my hands. Maybe that’s all this was. Had I just been coming into heat? Maybe I had mistaken some particularly strong heat symptoms for a mate bond. Did the stress of losing Jackson just put my heat instincts into overdrive and cause me to be overly attracted to Cain?
I reached for my purse and rummaged through it, looking for some ibuprofen to calm my pounding headache. I found some allergy pills, but no pain relievers. Frustrated, I tossed my purse to the side and headed back to the bathroom.
I didn’t have a change of clothes, but everything I needed to take a shower was here. There were plush towels, sample bottles of shampoo and conditioner, and those little bars of hotel soap that dry your skin out but smell so nice.
I turned the shower on, and stepped inside. The hot water felt so good running over my body, but within minutes. I started to feel really weak and hungover, so I sat down on the shower floor.
Then, for the first time since yesterday evening, I let all of my emotions go. I was glad I had the running water and thick walls to cover the sounds because the sobs erupted from within me. Tears streaming down, my mind started spiraling and focusing on the most negative aspects of my situation.
Had I just done the same, silly thing twice? I had spent years with Jackson, deep down knowing he didn’t care for me as I did for him. I had known we didn’t have a true mate bond, but I’d ignored it. I’d been too scared to be alone to let him go.
And now, I had just done the same thing again with Cain! I had suspected, all last night, that he didn’t feel the same mate bond that I did. As soon as he didn’t bite me, I knew he didn’t feel it, but I tried to make excuses for him rather than accept that truth.
“Oh, Marlie, why are you so stupid in love?” I asked out loud.
I worked some shampoo into my hair from my seated position in the shower. I didn’t have the energy to properly rinse it out, so I just let the lather run down my face. I told myself I should probably get out of here, dry off, and head back to the apartment before Jackson showed up, but I just couldn’t make myself niove yet.
I considered transitioning. I usually did when I showered. Being able to shampoo my fur always made me feel more fully clean. But today, I feared that if I transitioned, I would not have the willpower to transition back to any human form. So, I finally climbed out of the shower, smooth legs and all, and dried myself off with the flutty, white towels.
I sat on the bathmat and pulled on my black leggings. Yesterday morning. I had pulled on these same, black leggings with no dea what that day was going to bring. That was back when things were okay! Jackson had hugged me goodbye just minutes later. Oh, how things can change in 24 hours.
Finally dressed, I stood up and looked in the mirror, I considered applying some makeup, but then decided it wasn’t worth sery while. I was just going to head home anyways I shoved everything into my purse and stepped out of the bathroom.
Marlie
18-18 Fri, Oct
Chapter 5
The voice made me jump. It was as if my brain didn’t know whether to be scared or excited to hear it.
“C…Cain!” I finally responded. Instantly, my hands shot up to my head, trying to calm the hair that I knew looked wet, matted, and overly dog–like, even for a werewolf,
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“S.. sorry if I scared you. I didn’t know you’d be up,” Cain explained. His expression was somehow different from last night. He looked sad and sullen, as though someone had just given him bad news.
I shrugged my shoulders towards my cats, trying my best to hide in my sweater. I hadn’t wanted him to see me like this, all red and puffy eyed.
“Oh, it’s fine. I just thought you’d left.” I replied, my voice small and mousy.
Cain plunked his overnight bag down on the floor. “Just had to take a call and didn’t want to wake you,” he explained.
my puffy eyes
Cain turned and walked back over to the bed, collapsing back onto it. He didn’t seem to mind or even notice my put and red face, which helped me relax a little.
I slowly approached the bed and tentatively laid down beside him, my legs stretching off the side. He turned to look at me, and smiled warmly.
“That was quite the night,” I said, trying to break the awkwardness.
“Sure was. That bar we were at was pretty cool. We don’t have places like that back home,” Cain explained.
I nodded. “Yeah, After Dark is the only real werewolf bar here, so they do a nice job. Where did you say you’re from again?” I
“Eh, a few hours from here. It’s a small pack. You won’t have heard of it.” Cain replied, rising from the bed as he spoke.
I opened my mouth to question Cain further, suddenly remembering that I’d struggled to get him to talk about himself last night. But before I could say anything more, he took my hand and pulled me up from the bed.
“Let’s get some breakfast. I’m starving.” he said flatly.
I knew I had been drunk last night, but I was certain Cain’s demeanor had changed since then. Last night, he’d been so incredibly warm and cordial to me. Now, he seemed distraught in some way. He headed straight to the hotel door, stepped through it, and almost let it slam in my face before quickly reaching back to catch it
“Sorry,” he mumbled, continuing down the hall
Where had Cain really gone this morning? I wondered as I followed him towards the staircase. Wherever he’d been, he sure didn’t come back in a good mood. I didn’t know him well enough to know whether this was typical or not All I could be certain of was that something, or someone, had really bothered him while I was in the shower.
ara
