52: Does Pumpkin Know?
TARA
Watching Aidan leave after our fight wasn’t easy. I could barely describe my feelings because they were all over the place, but I couldn’t help the way I reacted to hearing about the supposed date plans he made with Nadia.
A part of me wished that things were different, but we couldn’t just erase all the things that happened. I knew very well that the first step to healing things was a conscious effort from both parties to let the past go, but it wasn’t so easy when I was the only one on the receiving end.
I
It had been days since Aidan left the house, still without an explanation, and I didn’t know if he had returned to Attica pack or not. I couldn’t even bring myself to ask around about him.
The line was between pride and hurt, but I couldn’t choose a side.
Nadia already asked me about Aidan a couple of times, but I had no words for her. I just hoped that with time, she would ask fewer questions, and eventually, he would slip to the back of her mind.
I couldn’t bear the thought of her heart breaking by waiting for him and him not coming back.
The Saturday afternoon sun was bright, and it was the perfect weather for a nice nap, so I gave Nadia a shower and prepared
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her for one.
It only took thirty minutes into her favorite cartoon for her.to doze off, so I carried her to the room and made sure she was well tucked in.
Leaving the door partly open in case she woke up sooner than expected, I went to the living room.
It had also been a while since I had seen or heard from Esme, so she was visiting in a few minutes.
Once the doorbell rang, I knew that it was her, so I went ahead to open the door without checking first.
Esme was all smiles to see me, and so was I. I hadn’t seen her since the morning of the flood after Aidan made sure that she and the other residents had a temporary roof over their heads.
“Well, would you look at that? The kids these days find a new mansion and forget all about their old rickety neighbors until we come looking.”
Not bothering to hide my smile since I knew that Esme had a thing for cracking jokes, I hugged her tightly before leading her inside.
“You know that is not even the case, Esme. We’ve been
swarmed with work, and…“, I hesitated, wondering if I should just jump right into it before she even settled down. “A lot has been going on.”
“Let’s get that bottle of wine and talk on the balcony then, right? It’s a nice weather out there today,” Esme said, a familiar glint shining in her eyes.
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“Are you sure you should be drinking around this time of the day?” I didn’t add the “at your age” part because Esme could pull my ears off if I said that.
Propping both hands on her waist, she questioned. “What else are we supposed to do while we chat? Look into the sky?”
Shaking my head with a small laugh, I quickly made it to the kitchen to retrieve two glasses and a bottle of wine. One with at little percentage of alcohol, because I didn’t want to be held responsible for the old woman’s heart attack or dramatics when the effects of the alcohol kicked in.
Once we were seated outside on the balcony with our glasses in hand, Esme asked. “And my little sugar pie?”
“She’s taking a nap. I plan to join her after this and just relax. It’s been a while since we had an entire day to ourselves.”
Eyeing me knowingly, Esme went further with the questioning. “And the man? The one who bought this house for the two of you?”
Needing some liquid courage, I emptied my glass and took my time refilling it before I spoke again.
“He didn’t buy us the house, Esme. It’s his, and we’re only staying here till the houses get fixed.”
Esme saw through me. “The leak was fixed enough for me to move back in, but apparently not for you. You’re still here.”
Like I said, she saw through me.
If we had wanted to go back to our lives, we could have done.
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that a few days ago when Esme first called telling us that she was moving back in.
Aidan and I left things on a really sour note, and I kind of felt that leaving the house altogether would be the final blow to the situation. It would mean that we had really gone our separate ways with no idea of how to move forward.
That wasn’t something I wanted for either of us or for Nadia.
“We’ll be out soon,” I replied, giving Esme a short answer.
My drink was halfway down my throat when Esme spoke again.
“Does Pumpkin know that he’s much more to her than just her mother’s admirer?”
Choking on the wine, I spit it out, coughing uncontrollably.
Esme laughed. “What made you think I wouldn’t know, child? He hasn’t blinked in another direction since he saw the little girl’s eyes were the same as his. Did you really think it was a secret?”
And here I was thinking that I was doing a good job at keeping things on a low.
Not knowing what to say, I shook my head once.
“Not yet. There’s still a lot unresolved, and I just want to make sure that she doesn’t get hurt because of him.”
Esme looked at me confused.
“How could he hurt you? Has he shown any signs of being a danger to either of you since he’s been here?”
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I shook my head once. “No, but he did once, hurt me, I mean. And people never truly change, do they?”
Esme’s features turned into that of understanding. “I understand now. But you have to know that people make mistakes and can turn from them, don’t you think?”
Esme didn’t understand.
She couldn’t possibly still think this if she knew what me and Nadia went through all those years ago. Scared, betrayed, and alone.
So I answered. “That’s not a risk I’m willing to take with my daughter involved. At least, not yet. As for Nadia not knowing about Aidan, what you do not know cannot harm you, right? If she doesn’t know that Aidan is much more…yet… she can’t get heartbroken by him.”
It seemed today wasn’t the day for Esme to take sides with me.
“Yes,” she nodded. “But you also do not know what the next day might hold, so you have to live today like it’s going to be your last.” She inhaled a sharp breath. “For example, just yesterday, one of the packmates was attacked by a Stonewolf. They left. him half infected, and one could only imagine what plans and decisions he had been pushing back for how long. You wouldn’t want a sad story like that one now, would you?”
Shaking my head once, I drank more of my wine, choosing to ponder on all Esme had said.
The rest of the afternoon with Esme was spent in more silence than spoken words, as was our tradition. She had a thing for displacing one with her words and going silent right after like.
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she was meditating or reminiscing on them.
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Esme left about an hour later, and I immediately went to my bed to catch some rest.
Different thoughts filled my mind, keeping me wide awake for a while, but before I knew it, sleep pulled me under.
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